Wednesday, June 19, 2013

I've Fallonized my life...


I have exactly 3 hours before I become a taxi driver.  Three hours to sit around and do nothing before three children who can't drive anywhere want me to drive them somewhere.  NEED me to drive them somewhere because they can't be HERE with nothing to do.  140 acres of nothing to do.  A pond with nothing to do.  Swings and streams and jumping apparatus with nothing to do.  Zip lines and cute fuzzy baby animals to cuddle with nothing to do.  Seriously.

So because I love this man and sometimes get a chance to watch, I'm going to make my own PROS and CONS list of my life right now.




1. Bruins have made it to the Stanley Cup Playoffs

Pros: Playoff hockey is some of the best hockey to watch.  I love hockey.  And I like watching good hockey.

Cons: There is a LOT of playoff hockey, which means there is a LOT of imbibing in beer and chips and pizza and popcorn and generally being lazy.  I've also been staying up way too late for this 40 year old which makes for a very short (not in stature) Mommy the next day.  But whatever.


2.   I got a new car


Pros: No struts or axles about to break.  Front breaks don't need to be replaced.  A back gate that stays up.  No sliding door that gets stuck and doesn't shut on its own.  An air conditioner that works.  It's clean clean clean.

Cons: Not as much room as my awesomely spacious mini van.  I don't feel as cool without my mini van (I know this is messed up).  I have children who don't care about keeping it clean clean clean and will step in dog poop (not purposely, I know) but still step in poop and then climb into my new clean clean clean car. But whatever.



3.  It is the end of the school year

Pros: This means that there are (at least) four reasons to bake cookies, muffins, whatever.  I like to bake, especially when whatever I bake leaves the house so I can't eat it.

Cons: more dishes to wash and a husband who gets pissed that no one is willing to share what we bake for events/teachers/parties with him.  But whatever.




4.  Summer is (maybe) here!

Pros: We don't have to get up at 6:30 every morning to get somewhere.  

Cons: When we do finally get up someone is usually bored within 15 minutes.  I've made a list of 25 things (and 25 additional things just for Claire) for them to refer to when they say they're bored.  I'm tired of saying to them that boring people are bored.  They just don't get it.  But whatever.


5.  The adventures begin! Beach, camping, Minnesota!  Let's GO!

Pros:  Yay!  Fun.

Cons: House sitters, animal sitters, packing, unpacking, laundry, weeding, cleaning and the general anxiety I have about leaving the house.  This stresses me OUT!  Can someone else do it?  Please.



6.  I got a new job for the fall teaching high school students. (part-time)

Pros:  Yay!  I'm back in the game.  

Cons:  I actually have to do something now.